Epiphany

Today, I had an epiphany. Rather a realiziation of what I need to do, how I need to approach things, and moving on. For years, I have always beaten myself up over my past and things that I have done. I have always felt myself unworthy of ANYTHING good, and ANYTHING precious, special, lovely, even spiritual. Although I have had many opportunities to repent, each time I have/do, I have always been stuck on that one thing, "Forgiveness" and moreso in myself. I continue to let my past haunt me, my insecurities become fed, when I choose to NOT forgive myself.

A good friend of mine and co-worker, enlightened me on this beautiful thing, she is not a member of the church and yet, she is also Christian. She told me that even though we've made mistakes, God has forgiven us, and if we continue to let something that he has already forgiven haunt us, then what good was it to have repented? She told me, to keep on asking God for forgiveness, is not having faith in Him that he has.

To me although her statement can be taken in SOOO many ways, I sincerely took this as yes. We repent daily and ask God for the things that we have done wrong to be forgiven, yet why do we do things that would keep us to ask for forgiveness. Maybe I'm not saying this entirely right, however, I felt today that my Heavenly Father, has shown me SOOOOO many countless and numerous ways in which he has forgiven me. Those things, just to name a few:

1. I have an amazing relationship with my family
2. I have a Wonderful, God fearing, Hard-Working, Loving Husband, who adores me.
3. I have a Beautiful, Healthy little baby girl, who brings joy and reminds me of His love each and every day
4. I have air to breathe
5. A place to lay my head and live
6. LIFE itself.

My Heavenly Father has done everything to show His love for me, and yet I keep dwelling on what I have done wrong, instead of continuing to make His name proud and do something right, and all the time.

I feel moreso, that forgiveness in myself is starting to settle and my heart of stone is beginning to melt. I am excited and blessed beyond words for the beauty in all of God's creations, in turn exemplify's TRUE, PURE, ETERNAL LOVE.

I am indeed grateful!